It amazes me how many times I hear a man say he rarely hears his woman say she’s proud of him or compliments him. It equally amazes me when a woman says she never hears “I love you” or “You’re beautiful,” from her man. As someone in a relationship, complimenting your spouse abundantly and daily should be a top priority. Here is why?
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, an honest compliment…” – Leo BuscagliaClick to tweet
Builds a Stronger Relationship
In successful relationships, studies show that compliments outnumber criticisms by 5 to 1. A compliment is a reminder of the love that you both share. It’s also a great way to remind yourself of why you fell in love with that person in the first place. When relationships begin, we focus on all the positive things, paying little attention to small annoyances. As time goes on, we tend to start focusing more and more on the annoyances until in some cases, they dominate our thoughts. If remained unchecked, this will lead to regretful comments and distance. Complimenting your spouse reinforces all the great things you love about that person while keeping those little annoyances just that…little.
Studies also show that when a person is complimented they tend to do more of what it is that they are being complimented on. A great way to get your spouse to do what you want right!?
“I appreciate you so much for helping me out in the kitchen.”
“I like how handsome you look in that blue shirt.”
When complimenting your spouse, be specific and don’t skimp on the appreciation. Show it whenever you can.
Think of it as a positive circle. Compliments = Receiver Happy = Return Compliments and Repeat Behavior = A Happier Relationship.
Daily life carries with it stress and a seemingly never-ending onslaught of negativity. It can be easy to get caught up in all of this and bring a person down; A boss’s criticism, a co-worker gossiping, a coffee shop employee being rude and disrespectful. We carry this baggage with us day in and day out and it’s difficult to remember that we are NOT just a cog in a wheel. Complimenting your spouse fills that person with a sense of pride and worth. It is the brightness in a day that may have been nothing but gloom. Email your spouse at work daily and compliment them. I call it a “Drive By” email. It’s a short, email that says something about them that you love. What a great way to increase someone’s self-esteem!
Complimenting your spouse will create a stronger, healthier relationship. Doing so will also remind the both of you why you fell in love in the first place. Remember, when you are the recipient of a compliment, accept it. Refuting the fact that you are beautiful or handsome when your spouse tells you so is like turning down a gift. It was a thoughtful gesture that should be accepted graciously.